Celebrate the gifts and transformative power of the menopause

or, as I like to call it, your Maturessence

I feel that too often we hear about the negative sides of the peri menopause, instead of its nourishing and positive sides. We are taught to fear it instead of celebrating it. In this blog, I want to focus on the gifts of the menopause more than the challenges. However even women who struggle can benefit from valuing the gifts and the resources of TCM.

Check out my other posts on the menopause on this Substack and my videos on my YouTube channel.

🌱 Why I Say Maturessence, Not Menopause 🌱

Mature = wisdom, evolution, ripening.
Essence = your life force, energetic DNA.

Maturessence = the fruition of your soul.

Menopause sounds like an ending, pause or loss. Maturessence is the opposite: a ripening of your Essence, a deepening of self.

It marks a profound transition when you are freed from your monthly cycles to connect with larger cycles. You don’t lose Essence — you refine and redirect it. It’s the start of a new phase of wisdom, vitality, and expression.

Maturessence expresses:

✨ A ripening of wisdom.
✨ A deepening of self.
✨ A new phase of embodied power.

Just like Adolescence marks the journey into adulthood, Maturessence marks the emergence into mature womanhood.

(not be to confused with Matresence: a term sometimes used to describe motherhood)

🔸 Matrescence = the transition into motherhood
🔸 Maturessence = the transition into wise womanhood

Both are sacred gateways. One begins the parenting journey; the other begins the fruiting of your Essence.

The ancient Chinese view of the Menopause or Maturessence

The ancient Chinese, like many traditional cultures, celebrated the gifts of the menopause (maturessence), calling it our “Second Spring”. Since puberty, whether or not women have had children, they use many of their resources to prepare for a potential pregnancy. The menstrual cycle uses your “Blood” as your womb lining builds. In TCM this is more than the blood and lymph circulating in your body. It includes an energy of deep emotional and physical nourishment. It also uses your “Essence”, your life force energy of conception, your energetic DNA, to mature eggs and build up the lining of your womb for eventual implantation. Half way through your life, you need these energies for yourself. The menopause is not a decline but a reorientation of your energy. You become the “baby” who needs love and nourishment. It is a redirection of your Blood and Essence so that you can nourish yourself and your projects for the second half of your life. .

Is there a hormone deficiency in the menopause?

The ancient Chinese view is very different view than the view commonly held by many people today: the menopause is a time of hormone deficiency. I always found that perspective rather strange. Our hormones simply return, more or less, to our pre-puberty levels. We are not told that we are deficient in hormones then. It is a natural body response to changed needs and it is odd that it has become seen as a pathology.

A powerful re-set: messages from your soul

The transition, or perimenopause, is a powerful reset of your body. Some women I have worked with describe hot flushes as messages from their soul. Others report that they are more able to listen to their needs rather than those of others and be happy and grateful for small things. It can feel like a falling back from the outside world into your inner world. Your energy turns inward, asking you to listen to your body more deeply and find your own rhythms, which may not be the based on the monthly or moon cycle.

Your sexual energy may change. This can be in a positive way as you are free from worries about becoming pregnant and from having to think about contraception. For many women sex can become a more fulfilling experience and they may discover a new relationship to their sexuality.

If you experience physical or emotional challenges in the menopause see it as opportunity to ask what is behind them. What can you do? What support do you need? I find that the base of most of the symptoms is exhaustion. For the ancient Chinese exhaustion is seen as a depletion of Essence and there are ways we can support this: primarily by working with the Extraordinary Vessels. In our society I believe this deep exhaustion is because women struggle to balance the many roles they have, especially if they feel they need to be strong and do it all on their own. Women forget it is only recently, from the 1980’s onward, that most women work full time and have children and a family home to care for. It is also relatively new that women are also caring for their own parents during their perimenopause. Many women see asking for support as a weakness and struggle on: but it is essential to recognise when you need support.

Watch my video on YT

Valuing rest and self-love is a powerful way to celebrate these changes.

My own perimenopause, like that of many women, was an opportunity to take stock. I, had been juggling too many balls, feeling I needed to be super woman. At least working as a shiatsu and massage therapist is nourishing and I have to look after myself as part of being able to do it. I wasn’t deeply exhausted. I didn't have hot flushes, apart from the odd occasion when I ate sugar or drank alcohol and so I stopped both. My mood remained fairly stable. It felt more like a lightening, a sense of ease. I received strong messages to take more time for me. My main symptom was a frozen shoulder which I got after falling off my bike to avoid a dog in the park. I paid more attention to the dog than to me. This was a lesson to value me before others.

Having a frozen shoulder for nearly a year made me take my self-care to a new level. It helped that my children had left home by then. I made sure I received even more shiatsu, massage, osteopathy and acupuncture than I did before. I increased my daily movement practice. I learnt a lot about the Linking Vessels of TCM. They are your “wings” which open to receive and close to draw in support as well as protect your Heart and your Palace (sexual organs) .I realised I needed to be clearer about my opening, allow myself to receive more and set appropriate boundaries for work commitments as well as in my relationships.

The invisible “menstrual cycle”

In the early menopause even though there is no longer any blood, the body continues to move through an invisible “menstrual “cycle. It takes time to settle into this new way of being. Many women find a strong pull to rest, especially around the time they would usually bleed. They can honour that by slowing down, nourishing themselves and creating space for stillness. Women may also strongly feel and njoy their ovulation’ time.

Discovering New rhythms and ways of being

As time goes by women find new rhythms and ways of being, and may even have more energy than before. Fourteen years have now passed since my last bleed, and I don’t feel a decline of energy. In some ways I feel I have more energy, because I am more focused in how I use it. I have learnt better ways to manage stress. I have let go of many of the anxieties I had been carrying from my childhood. I remember my dad saying he didn’t feel all that different physically until he was in his 80’s. I think our perspective and belief system on ageing plays a huge role in how well we feel.

We remain cyclical beings. We have high and low energy days, but they aren’t necessarily related so strongly to moon or monthly cycles. I pay attention to what helps me maintain a steady flow of energy and not get exhausted, while recognising, like the world in which we live, we are influenced by many factors; the changing weather, what is happening in the wider world, my own busyness, the seasons and so on.

“Maturessence”: Your second spring and summer: a new phase of growth and creativity

Your “maturessence” is a second spring: a new phase of growth and creativity. You settle into new rhythms. Your hormone levels are similar to those of a child and you rediscover the nature of your being. You may discover a new way of expressing your sexuality. You are in your “ wise woman” phase. You may become a grandmother, or have friends who have grandchildren, and connect directly with your creative child in a new way through your grandchildren. After this second spring comes a second summer: a flourishing of creative projects. Many women have their most fulfilling years in their 60s or 70s.

Towards the second autumn of your life: gathering in your life harvest

From my observations of friends and colleagues and clients in their 80s, it feels that this is a shift into the second autumn: a gathering in, a taking stock of life. Many remain creative and physically active, but feel that their energy is gradually slowing down. In our 90s there is more of the ending of autumn and moving into the winter of our lives: a preparation for death and letting go of this world.

Of course this is for women who have few, if any health concerns. The cycles do not express over these time frames if we die earlier. The seasons shorten but there is always a cycle of peak activity moving inwards until a final letting go.

Create daily rituals to celebrate your new being

Wherever you are in your cycle of life, celebrate your new being. Create daily rituals which nourish, ground and centre you. Each morning you could take time for a full body self-massage with warm oil or a body brush. You can also include gentle massage of the outer gateways of your Palace, your Jade gate (clitoris), to honour your sexual nature. .

Daily rituals are whispers to yourself. I see you; I care for you, You are sacred. They help you feel more at home in your body, as it continues its journey through life. They help you meet these shifts with more softness and presence.

Take pleasure in life. What brings you joy? Make a list and post it somewhere you can see it every day. Every day do at least one thing, maybe more, which brings you joy.

I have created some affirmations to help you connect with the gifts of your “maturessence” and some which help you accept its challenges.

Gifts: to read as affirmations

I embrace the gifts of the menstrual cycle phases in my own rhythms and can switch between them as I need.

I enter my second spring - a new phase of wisdom and learning.

I find new expressions for my creative energy, respecting that my physical strength is waning, but my capacity to direct my energy is growing.

I rediscover the playfulness and flexibility of the child, with my newfound wisdom.

Challenges

Can I release the past to be fully present?

Can I release what I no longer need without the physical support of menstruation and ovulation? Can I release limiting patterns which keep me held in the past, depleting my energy?

Am I able to release my youth and embrace my ageing gracefully?

Tips and further support

I also have some videos with dynamic and gentle exercises for the peri menopause depending on which cycle you are in.

It is important to continue to care for your pelvic floor:

and your breasts

I find working with your Shoulders and the Linking Vessels can help you continue weaving the tapestry of life with ease: opening your heart to others and the world and knowing how to receive and protect yourself. Stepping Vessels exercises help you to be fully present in your body.

If you don’t know much about TCM or these Vessels I also have many videos on these. See my playlist: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLRyKR6A8Bqdbzvqs9guKvvpHQa4i-02VH

Welcome to the wonderful world of shiatsu and TCM. I’d love to hear how you get on.

Please let me know your self-care rituals and how you honour yourself in this time of your life